It's just a little crush, not like everything I do depends on you This week is gonna fucking kill me. Once again my school life rears its ugly head and I'm about ready to cry at the sight of it. I want to do what I want, as I have explained for the longest time, but I can't. I can't do what I want. I could never do what I want. Instead I feel out of control and out of the loop. I can't do much because my friends seem to be fine without me...or at least they keep busy. I'm bored of everything I have. I'm generally bored with my life, and I honestly don't know what to do about it. I've tried, I've waited for the summer, and no change. I need to get out of the house, I need to move out...desperately. Maybe that will alleviate some pains of being haunted by my parents. I mean, my damn car was not even starting, and my mom was more concerned about me fixing an oil leak than getting my car to start again. She's been driving that damn point forever. I wish I could tape her mouth shut and leave her be...or tell her how much that time she tried to leave us still bothers me. I want to inflict pain onto someone...I'm tired of being pushed around and pulled here and there. I want to fight back....